29th March 2010

That's the date for my last PUBLISHED blog post.

I repeat, PUBLISHED.

Which means I have written some craps but they have never gotten the chance to be famous, to be read, & to be appreciated.  Heh

I am currently listening to Wali Band - Orang Bilang.

Google it, you'll love it ;) Because I know I do!

Whaaat?  I like them.  Like, seriously.

I have all of their 3 albums!

My dad influenced me okay, just like every other Indonesian bands.

My dad does not only have great management, public relation, etc. etc. skills, but he also possess good taste in music with great & meaningful lyrics.

I've been living with guilt, shamefulness, hatred, & some other negative values for the past few months.

I always screw up big time & never get the chance to fix it neither to learn anything from it.

I am the type of person who embraces good memories & rarely remember revenges and betrayals.

When I stated this,

"I am not the type of person who can just simply let go of the past. I'm sorry, I just can't."

Basically what I was trying to say is that I am still holding on to our memories.

I haven't thrown away our pictures in the purse, I still keep your passport-sized picture, I keep your name in my contacts the same way (even though yeah I know our friend changed my name in yours), & most importantly I still let the ticker thing counts our days together.

I was scolded by a friend for making the same mistake again.

I guess it just serves me right.

Oh dear particular new person, 

please understand my situation.

I don't have the guts hurt you.  I have truly convey my lack of interest in you, why can't you realize that?

I really appreciate for whatever you have done for me.

But honestly, I have to stop hurting everyone who loves me~

Ps.  He marked his territory since the past 4 years, please don't blame him. You can't just come here & trespass his highly guarded fence around my heart.  But oh beby, I will I promise I will let go of you & move on if that's what you want . . .  And only then I can remove that ticker thing :)